see that girl you just called a lesbian? is she? can you help me get her number?
- Figure out which cologne Hannibal hates most. Bathe in it before all appointments.
- Put greasy lotion on hands and smear on leather chairs.
- Randomly rearrange books when Hannibal’s not looking.
- Step in dog shit. Surreptitiously wipe on conveniently located desk chair.
- "Accidentally" knock his pretentious and symbolic stack of drawings to the floor. "Accidentally" step on them while picking them up.
- Make the pens on his desk crooked.
- Show up exactly one minute late to three appointments in a row, then show up four minutes late.
- Interrupt him whenever he starts to give a speech about God or death or whatever, then continue to interrupt him with apologies when he tries to continue.
- Dog hair. Dog hair everywhere.
Just shoot the son of a bitch.(Too subtle. Can’t let him die without having a long conversation about the nature of morality and the subjective nature of the sanctity of life.)